If you stand up for yourself in the workplace to a bully and a dysfunctional person, you may find that you’re the only person in that workplace to speak up about it.
Most people in the workplace stay quiet, accept the nonsense, and tolerate the dysfunction. This is not a judgment or criticism of others. I have empathy for the reasons why someone decides to not say anything, especially in a toxic work environment.
I’ve been connecting with a lot of leaders lately – the kind of people like me who will be the anomaly that decides to speak up and say something. The kind of person who says, “enough is enough” and you decide to stop tolerating dysfunction in your workplace. I’d like to share with you that while you may feel alone, you’re not. There are a lot of people who agree with you, and who you’re helping:
- That lovely woman sitting in the corner of the office – she’s a single mother who is getting sexually harassed in the workplace, and she appreciates that you stood up to the bad boss.
- That new employee who you’re just getting to know – they left their previous job, where everything was fine for them, to come into this company for the promise of “career advancement” and a “great team”. It turns out this toxic workplace is nothing like they imagined it to be, and while they are putting on a brave face, they are internally freaking out, wondering how they’re going to get a new job so they can leave this dysfunctional job behind. This new employee appreciates your courage to speak up.
- That colleague of yours approaching retirement – they’ve sort of given up on life. They feel like no one cares, and while they don’t like the dysfunction, they’re numb to it because it’s all they’ve seen and experienced their entire working life. This colleague is inspired by your willingness to push back against the dysfunction in the workplace.
A Real-World Example
Let me provide you with a real-world, practical example. I once worked for a quite toxic tech company in downtown Rotterdam, Netherlands. At this company I experienced the worst boss I’ve ever had and, frankly, an entire culture of assholes.
It went beyond gossiping and backstabbing, which is bad enough. Colleagues were actively sabotaging me – not only spreading lies, but even trying to prevent me from getting hired elsewhere by badmouthing me to other companies. A lot of it was jealousy, but, in my opinion, it just came down to them being crappy, low-consciousness people.
While it’s tempting to open the can of worms here (and my blunt Glassdoor review was a long one and got lots of reads and likes!) what I’d really like to share is the power of speaking up. After six months of insanity, I sent a respectful resignation email to the CEO, explaining that I experienced the culture as completely toxic.
The CEO ended up giving me a counteroffer, allowing me work from home days, a better salary, and improved working conditions. With no other job lined up at the time, I took the offer and used the extra time there to continue looking for better options. While I didn’t change the nasty true colors of many of my colleagues, I was able to:
- Hire an intern and become his manager.
- Work directly with the CEO to build out an entire content team, something that my jerk boss (who ended up quitting the company well before me) said wouldn’t be possible.
- Shift the mindset of the company from constantly being preoccupied with short-term results to seeing the value in thinking long-term.
Even my haters at the company genuinely said to my face that I accomplished a whole lot while working there, in the way I did several public speeches, mobilized resources, and helped get SEO prioritized.
The point is that one person speaking up can make ripples, even when you’re surrounded by disingenuous people.
The Ripple Effect Is Real
It might seem like no one is noticing. It might seem like you’re all alone. But you’re not. People are sincerely appreciative of your efforts to make your workplace a better place, and for some people going through severe struggles, your actions mean the world to them.
Your leadership is valuable and it’s creating a ripple effect.
Jeff Davis is an award-winning author, most recently publishing The Power of Authentic Leadership: Activating the 13 Keys to Achieving Prosperity Through Authenticity. Connect with him on LinkedIn and subscribe to his YouTube channel. For three free books (The Power of Authentic Leadership, Reach Your Mountaintop, and Traveling Triumphs) in exchange for being added to his email list, email his Executive Assistant at meg@jeffdspeaks.com. Learn more about his story on his About page and feel free to check out his author page on Amazon. Also feel free to contact Jeff directly via jeff@jeffdspeaks.com. What Jeff does best is sharing his work experiences in a way that adds real value to others. Consider bringing him to speak as a mental health, authentic leadership, resiliency, and/or workplace culture expert at your next event. He’s also available as an Executive Coach. His new book The Courage to Leave: Breaking Free from Toxic Workplaces launches on April 18th.
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