Thank you for stopping by my website and taking the time to learn more about me. At age 17, living in Newtown, Connecticut and going to high school at Fairfield Prep in Fairfield, Connecticut, I was suicidal. I know that’s blunt, but I’m open about the challenges I’ve faced in a way that helps other people. I had suicidal thoughts because of a series of unexpected setbacks I faced. To briefly touch on one of those setbacks: despite being a college-recruit baseball player and one of the best players in the league, in my senior year of high school I was unexpectedly cut from the baseball team for no apparent reason other than I wasn’t one of the coach’s favorites.
What made this especially difficult to deal with is one, senior year as a whole sucked – I was genuinely putting all my hopes, dreams, and happiness onto being on the high school baseball team. What we see in the movies isn’t reality, and things don’t always turn out the way we expect. Two, piggybacking off the first point, because my senior year of high school was so different from what I imagined it to be, I was clinically depressed. Getting cut from the baseball team didn’t cause my depression – it worsened it and was the proverbial straw that broke the camel’s back. Finally, I had a phenomenal tryout. In the final day of tryouts, we were scrimmaging against another team. I crushed a double against a Division I college-recruit pitcher, literally one of the best pitchers in the country at our age-level. Many of the other players on my team struck out and couldn’t get a hit off of him. Based on my outstanding performance in the scrimmage and tryout as a whole, my teammates and many people who knew me thought it was a no-brainer for me to be the starting left fielder. If that wasn’t enough, it’s also worth mentioning that I was a star baseball player on an elite summer travel AAU baseball team, Team Connecticut Baseball. Based on my strong performance while playing for Team Connecticut Baseball, I had 7 letters in the mail from highly interested colleges and universities.
When I got cut from the team after the final scrimmage, it didn’t make any sense. Shortly thereafter, I seriously considered hanging myself. I was in such tremendous psychological pain because I was certain that I’d not only be on the team, but I’d be a starter as so many others thought I would. For more details about how to get through the dark night of your soul, feel free to check out my post “How to Move Forward When You Feel Like Your Life Is Over” on the popular Tiny Buddha website.
Having shared this story with tens of thousands of people around the world, I’ve gotten mixed reactions. Some empathize with the story and say it changed their life (I say that in a humble way). Some come off as indifferent to the story, but admit I shared it in a heartfelt and genuine way. And finally some people – not many, but some – roll their eyes at me. They tell me that getting cut from a high school team doesn’t even come close to comparing to the real tragedies of the world. I have a few thoughts to share around this, in a non-defensive and authentic way. One, did I ever for even a split-second compare my story to someone else’s story? No, of course not. I’m the first to admit that other people have been through worse situations and circumstances than me. I know my story isn’t for everyone, but the reason I’m sharing it is to say Hey – I went through something challenging and somehow came out on the other end in one piece. Here’s what I have to say. If sharing this helps even one person, then sharing it is worth it.
It’s also important to note I had no perspective. No one seemed to care about what I was going through and I didn’t have the coping mechanisms necessary to deal with unexpected challenges. Despite all my good grades, I never actually learned in a classroom how to deal with life’s setbacks. As a quick yet important sidebar, we definitely need to start teaching our kids real life skills, like emotional intelligence, how to deal with bullies, how to handle money, how to sustain successful relationships, and how to deal with unexpected setbacks. I say this respectfully, but our schools tend to teach kids skills they’ll never need or use in life.
Over the last twelve years, I went from someone on the brink of suicide to speaking, writing, traveling, and helping people all around the world. I’ve seen first-hand the incredible power of personal development and that’s why I’m so passionate about teaching it to others. Please don’t misunderstand: It was a long, slow, and grueling process. It was often one step forward, two steps back. But on the other side of change is a life filled with joy, meaning, purpose, and difference-making.
Fast forward to today and I live in Rotterdam, Netherlands, a little more than an hour train ride away from downtown Amsterdam. I graduated from Johns Hopkins Carey Business School with a Master’s degree in 2013. I’m a professional speaker, authentic leadership expert, Amazon bestselling author, entrepreneur, world traveler, and humanitarian. With ten years of experience working in the field of digital marketing, I have hands-on experience as a leader who managed high-performing teams. I speak to schools, nonprofits, organizations, businesses, associations, and conferences. I’ve shared my practical insights internationally across three different continents and I’m a sought-after authority on authentic leadership, self-leadership, overcoming adversity, and suicide prevention.
While speaking to businesses and corporations, I focus on sharing powerful authentic leadership content. While speaking to schools, I focus on suicide prevention and anti-bullying. It takes leadership to get through difficult challenges and deal with cruel bullies, so my talks to schools are strongly integrated with my authentic leadership expertise. I help as many people as I can around the world.
With experience living and traveling abroad, I’ve interviewed hundreds of world-renowned experts mixed with lots of practical application and I’m always leaving audiences with useful tips and strategies. I’m the author of the award-winning book Reach Your Mountaintop: 10 Keys to Finding the Hidden Opportunity in Your Setbacks, Flipping What You’ve Heard on Its Head, and Achieving Legendary Goals. This book shows you how to achieve your own version of success, and features insights from my conversations with 28 world-renowned experts and leaders. I also wrote the Amazon bestseller The Power of Authentic Leadership: Activating the 13 Keys to Achieving Prosperity Through Authenticity, featuring insights from a billionaire, various icons, and legendary difference-makers.
I’ve worked with fascinating, top-notch companies in Connecticut, Maryland, the Netherlands, and Budapest, the capital of Hungary. I’ve taken part in everything from start-ups and county governments to a Fortune 500, and I’ve demonstrated a unique ability to share meaningful and relevant authentic leadership insights with audiences. I’ve been featured on Forbes, Tiny Buddha, Personal Growth, Sivana East, LEADx, HavingTime, and other prominent websites. John Lee Dumas, one of the top podcasters in the world, had me on his podcast twice, and I’ve been featured on countless other podcasts as well.
I did a well-received TEDx talk in New York City called “How to Fulfill Your Inner Life.”
I’d love to connect with you further and become friends. To continue the conversation, please contact my Executive Assistant Meg via meg@jeffdspeaks.com to set up a quick phone call. Below are some testimonials from CEOs who have seen me speak, talking about the value I provide.
“When I met Jeff for the first time he was so refreshing and honest. He’s a breath of fresh air. I now live each day being my authentic self – true to me and knowing what I need instead of being everything to everyone else. Thank you for the gift of a lifetime. Jeff is the most authentic person I have ever met!” – Maryanne Ligmanowski, CEO, Norway Built
“Being in Jeff’s presence, Jeff is definitely an authentic human. The magic is that others receive permission to be their authentic selves when they’re with him.” – Amy Bernier, Say Yes Coach, amybernier.com
“Jeff is a top-notch professional speaker, one of the best in the world.” – Klaus Larsen, CEO, Klaus Larsen LLC
Check out more of the written and video testimonials of my professional speaking on the Testimonials page.
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